Parenting from the past… “now, when I was a kid” Mistakes in judgment I’ve made in trying to parent based on MY childhood experiences. I think it’s only natural to try to use my memory of what I was like as a child or a teen to try to navigate what my kids might be going through. It turns out, when I try to parent based on what I was doing at their age, I’ve made mistakes or had lapses of judgment… often in funny ways. Parenting issues I thought were universal through the ages… change over time like the rest of life.
OAKLAND COUNTY MOMS BLOG ENTRIES
Parenting From The Past
Parenting From The Past Mistake – Technology has ruined Christmas and Birthday Presents
I’ve spent nearly 12 years buying Christmas and birthday presents for my kids that they never wanted! Gifts from when I was a kid revolved around outdoor sports and games. Christmas morning was a plethora of board games, puzzles, maybe a handheld video game, sports equipment, etc. I used to try so hard to buy a smattering of fun, educational, useful games and toys for my kids when all they really wanted was an iPhone or a tablet! There’s a healthy mix to be had of non-electronic fun, but I definitely had to get out of the 80s/90s when it came to buying presents for my kids.
Parenting From The Past Mistake – Kids Don’t Ride Bikes as Much Any More
Sorry to generalize, but there is no way you can tell me that kids appreciate or use bikes like they used to. Blame helicopter parents, too many electronics, fear of crime, safety, or whatever… Bikes used to represent freedom and were sometimes the ONLY means of transportation for a kid. It’s definitely not that way any more. For every one mile my son or daughter have ridden their bikes, I’d conservatively estimate I put on 50 miles when I was their age.
Parenting From The Past Mistake – Kids Don’t Want to Drive Any More
I couldn’t wait to learn how to drive when I was a teenager. Freedom, adventure, transportation, all waiting to be had in my parents brown Chevy. A teen driving statistics recent study by the University of Michigan indicates that fewer teenagers are getting their driver’s licenses. Only 28 percent of 16-year-olds had their driver’s license in 2020, an 18% decline from 1983. I have nieces and nephews past the age of 17 that are extremely nervous to drive or flat-out refuse to or in favor of Uber taking care of the travel arrangements. My son’s tennis team coach forbids team members from driving themselves to and from tennis meets. Then, what’s the point of a teen having a drivers license if they can’t drive to sports practices??!
Parenting From The Past – Fashion Isn’t As Important
Another generalization but… “when I was a kid” you HAD to dress a certain way. Pinstripe Jordache jeans, Ocean Pacific shirt, Izod with the collar flipped up. I mean, you had it rough if you didn’t have these things. There was pressure to “dress to the 9s” and not repeat outfits. There are still fashion traps for kids today but they are far less important and far more informal. My kids and their friends often wear the SAME clothes (unheard of in my teens) nearly every day. Not only that, sweat pants, gym shorts, yoga pants, and sweatshirts are the norm. The emphasis on looking nice or expensive isn’t as important. I guess I’m grateful for this one.
I guess the moral of this parenting from the past story is that our childhoods might not seem like a million years ago, but in parenting years, they probably are. I’ve really had to adjust my way of thinking / parenting. The realization that I’m basically a dinosaur enabled me to relate to my children better.
