Step parenting survival guide. Over 30 million children live with a step parent in what many call blended families. Although each blended family has a unique set of circumstances, everyone faces similar challenges.
There is a step parenting book, We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed, to help guide parents in a newfound step parenting situation.
I had the chance to interview We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed author Diana Lesire Brandmeyer for some tips on how to navigate step parenting.
Lisa LaGrou Oakland County Moms – Should you change your children’s last names if you remarry?
We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed author Diana Lesire Brandmeyer – The only reason I personally would consider changing my child’s last name is if that biological father wasn’t present in that child’s life. That being said, if the biological father doesn’t care and the child wants to change the name then go for it.
Lisa LaGrou Oakland County Moms – How can you promote healthy relationships among the siblings?
We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed author Diana Lesire Brandmeyer – Tough question! For my family it was about learning to treat the siblings as if they were all my children from birth. From there they figure out their places with each other because getting favoritism from a parent isn’t possible. Do activities together tp help them make new memories, build that candy house for Christmas or do it in July and it will remain a fun memory of them all doing things together.
Lisa LaGrou Oakland County Moms – What do you do when siblings try to play parents against each other?
We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed author Diana Lesire Brandmeyer – That’s when you must communicate with your spouse. It is imperative that you know what the other is saying. Siblings in a nonblended family do this too, this is normal. This is about children trying to test the limits.
Lisa LaGrou Oakland County Moms – What do you suggest for combining both parents discipline methods?
We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed author Diana Lesire Brandmeyer – Again, communicate, before you get married! Does your spouse to be believe in spanking or time out? How do you feel about those? What’s your idea of punishment for __? Ask those questions and see where you can both give a little. If you’ve already married, then make a date and discuss these things soon.
Lisa LaGrou Oakland County Moms – What can you do when in-laws resist accepting you or your children?
We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed author Diana Lesire Brandmeyer – Be nice, as hard as that is when you or your children are hurting, be nice. You have a choice not to interact at all, but if it is possible I think it’s beneficial to all to keep trying. This didn’t happen for us, now I think if we had taken the time to ask them over for a meal, or a soccer game, something with a time limit we would have made it past the uncomfortable part of blending. Maybe not, but at least we would have tried.
About We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed Author Diana Lesire Brandmeyer
An accomplished author with a background in education and psychology, reflects on her experiences as a widowed mom with two sons who married a widowed dad with a son of his own. Now, with a few years of perspective, she uses the narrative of her experience to help others better navigate the issues that arise in a new family. Diana’s credits include My Devotions, The Metro East Family Gazette, Little Visits Family Devotions and The Lutheran Witness. She is the author of A Time to Dance, Mystery of the Smithton Necklace, and The Trouble with Ralph. Diana received her degree from Webster University, and lives in Southern Illinois with her family.
About We’re Not Blended, We’re Pureed Author Marty Lintvedt:
Diana’s friend, is a licensed professional counselor (MO) who is nationally certified counselor and a member of the American Association of Christian Counselors and the International Association of Marriage and Family Counselors. Their engaging, readable book is held together with humor, liberally peppered with informative commentary, and includes clinically sound informational sidebars and proven communication tools.
See related posts below for more step parenting articles and advice.
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